Tom Lee loves his daughter and will Resist Harm

Tom Lee loves his daughter and will Resist Harm

I used to call her my girl, but that was before she became a 19-year-old young woman. She’s still my daughter, Virginia, however, and I’ve never been more amazed by this college sophomore—and more called to the work before us in the United Methodist Church to #ResistHarm—than right now.

My name is Tom Lee (he, him, his), and I’m a lay person and a 32-year-member of West End United Methodist Church in Nashville. My church means everything to me. My spouse, Laurie, and I were married there. The ashes of our son, Hayden, are interred in the columbarium there. And it’s where Virginia was baptized and confirmed.

The United Methodist Church raised Virginia. It’s where she sang in the children’s choir, played handbells, attended Sunday School, went on mission trips, received her first Bible, and took communion. All these graces were freely offered by the love of the church and its good, good people. And yet, our church withholds graces from Virginia—and, thereby, all of us—for no reasons other than who she is. I cannot walk Virginia down the aisle of her wedding at West End, because she cannot be married there. And, should she one day find God’s call on her life to the ministry, she cannot fulfill it in our church.

This harm is shameful, and it must stop. That is why our family is committed to resisting it, in all its forms and however it presents itself, including at General Conference and the Southeast Jurisidictional Conference, where I’ll represent the Tennessee Conference this year as a lay delegate.

I intend to be as courageous in who God made me as Virginia is in who God made her. I hope you will, too.

Why not begin your day in prayer? Go to for our daily prayer guide.

Recent Updates

A Message to the UMC: Resist Harm
In the wake of a postponed General Conference and a continued pandemic, we are urgently called again to the work of Christ – in all the ways we can. Ever more clearly, we discern the disconnect between the logistics of our gathering and the call of the gospel.  The institutional fight to enshrine anti-LGBTQ+ policies […]
Prayer of Witness
Pray With those who have another year for preparing to serve as delegates to General Conference, that they may have patience in this time of waiting; With those who live in places where it is unsafe to claim the name of Christ; With those struggling to live Jesus’ way in places where money, power, greed, […]
Prayer of Light
Pray With those affected by natural disasters With those who are in their own dark night of the soul With those who see no hope or light With those around the world weary and searching for hope throughout years of war and disease With those who don’t see God’s promise of resurrection With those trapped […]
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Latest Resources

February Worship Planning Worksheet
We invite you to incorporate the work of resisting harm into the worship life of your church or group.  This worksheet is a tool for use by individuals or groups, as a starting point for finding ways to incorporate #ResistHarm into regular Sunday worship, small group meetings, or vigils and special services; it includes some starting points, […]
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Liturgy from enfleshed
With a commitment to spiritual and theological depth and the centering of marginalized experiences, conversations, and communities, enfleshed seeks to provide liturgy, devotionals, curriculum, preaching, training, and pastoral care that addresses honestly, tenderly, and directly, the beauty and pain of living enfleshed lives.
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Songs for the Holy Other
The Hymn Society has edited and shares this free volume of hymns affirming the LGBTQIA2S+ community. Visit their site to download.
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*The tools, resources, and opportunities posted on Resist Harm have been suggested by people or organizations associated with the movement. They are not necessarily endorsed by all of the partners.
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